I recently discussed the three basic types of personalities; A, B, C & D. In addition to the different character types, they as humans have a wide choice of interests & non-interests, as well as highs & lows. As such, it is impossible to know exactly how to properly relate to everyone in every situation all of the time. The common leveler is common courtesy.

By this I most definitely am not referring to "political correctness" which is concerned with pseudo-courtesy for political purposes. In lieu, common courtesy represents a actual respect for the human spirit & how they ought to interact. This is much over saying "please" & "thank you," it is treating others as they wish others to treat us.

Each day they transmit a series of messages which communicate how they regard others. This is done either verbally or through other means affecting our senses. These messages can either be perceived as positive or negative. For example, somebody who dresses or smells badly is sending a message that he is no regard for the others around him, as does foul habits such as belching or flatulence. Conversely, lovely grooming means you care how people perceive you. Other positive messages are conveyed through such things as greetings & handshakes, punctuality, & simple manners. Common courtesy, therefore, is concerned with sending positive messages as against negative. It also means our ability to practice common courtesy is a reflection of our character & how they wish other people to treat us.

Introductions, Handshakes & Greetings

In Japan, an introduction in a business setting is important. In addition to identifying yourself, it establishes your professional picture, & the superior or subordinate relationship for the three parties to assume the pecking order. Consequently, the Japanese practice introductions carefully, how a business card is introduced, as they recognize its importance. In contrast, people in the western world have a way more cavalier attitude towards introductions. Nevertheless, the introduction is every bit as important & sends signals as to how they perceive each other.

Lots of people underestimate the importance of a handshake. Actually it is the single most important message they can convey in an introduction.

Some people like to give a powerful vice grip handshake in an try to intimidate you, but most handshakes today by young people are weak & flabby. Actually you need to discover a lovely balance, not flabby & not strong. Further, look the other person square in the eyes when you shake hands, this conveys your sincerity in meeting the person. Do not trust somebody who fundamentally shakes your hand but doesn't look you in the eyes; they fundamentally do not care about you.

Shaking hands has historicallyin the past been a masculine custom, but this has changed in recent times. However, men still query the appropriateness of shaking a woman's hand. Because of this, it is the woman's responsibility to offer her hand. If they does not offer her hand, do not reach for it as they may feel uncomfortable doing so.

On meeting somebody for the first time, be cautious about using the other person's first name or nickname as this may be reserved for the person's relatives & friends. Use "Mister", "Ms", "Mrs" or "Miss" depending on the way you were introduced & permit them to say, "Please call me Joe." But if by chance you ask, "May I call you Joe?" Don't be surprised if somebody says, "No." In other words, do not risk embarrassment, let the other person make the offer to make use of their first name or nickname. & , whatever you do, do not call the other person "Dude," this ought to have gotten out of your vernacular after graduating from High School.

It is and a lovely practice to memorize the other person's name, when a business card is unavailable. Nothing is more embarrassing in a business relationship to both parties than to forget a name. Write it down in the event you cannot keep in mind it.

It is a lovely practice to greet your boss & coworkers on a every day basis when reporting to work (as well as saying your farewell at the finish of the day). Nobody wishes to feel unwelcome or unappreciated. In the event that they do, they will feel like outcasts & less likely to help you with something. The aim is to make people feel at home. This can be accomplished with a simple greeting such as "Good morning" or "How are you?" It is simple to detect when a greeting is honest or process.

Your aim is to appear genuinely concerned about the person. This can be achieved by:

* Complimenting on some personal attribute of the person (e.g., clothes, hair, automobile).

* Inquiring about a person's relatives (e.g., birthday observed, anniversary, graduation, pets, health, etc.)

* Asking about an event the person recently experienced (e.g., attendance at an event, a trip, participation in a volunteer organization/charity, a new job or project task, etc.),

* Commenting on something newsworthy - community, sports, weather ("What did you think about...?")

Such greetings are an expression of your interest in the person. often greetings become process &, as such, less credible. Try to break it up.

A lovely basic greeting can work wonders in building cooperation & relations between people.

Attention to Detail

Tiny details can have a dramatic effect in your relationship with others. For example:

* Be observant - if there is anything constant in life, it is alter. Alter is always around us, but it takes a perceptive person to be able to spot the smallest of changes, whether it be a new hair style, somebody losing weight, a tiny job well done, or whatever. When a alter is observed, ask yourself why it is happened.

Be curious & understand the rationale for the alter. This will help you change to the alter as well as improve your interpersonal relations. For example, people are fundamentally flattered when somebody compliments them on a alter. It means you are perceptive & interested in the person, both of which puts you in lovely standing with the other person.

It is these tiny observations that go a long way. As an example, perhaps the best secretary I ever met was a lady named Myrna who worked for an I.T. Director in Chicago. The first time I visited the office,

Myrna warmly greeted me & asked if I wanted a cup of coffee. Saying Yes, they then asked me what I wanted in it. I said cream & sugar, which they then made for me. Months later when I returned to visit the Director, Myrna greeted me by name & introduced me with a cup of coffee with cream & sugar.

Frankly, I was two times startled they not only recalled my name but how I also liked my coffee. Later I discovered Myrna maintained a simple card file; whenever somebody visited the office, Myrna would record their name & the type of coffee they liked. Sharp. sharp.